If it was just tears...

An odd day of ups and downs as usual. So I overslept again. Boo me. Uhh.. went to uni just for dantai. We practiced quite a bit. It was rather funny when I went to find Jono and em'. So outside the door they were at were these two white dudes. Looking through the peep hole and making fun of the "people dancing in animal hats". So what I did was take out my mobile, phone and Jono and say outloud "Hey Jono! There are two white guys outside your room making fun of ya~". I knew where they were, I just phoned for the hell of it. Heh. Then I went to the door and they went to the side to hide a bit. I doubt they were embarassed but I was trying to embarrass them. Shame it failed.

After dantai... well we were joined by quite a lot of people. Jeremy has been sititng with us lately while studying. Yeah, went to lunch table. We shortly left for Maccas Monday. A lot of people came a bit later. At Maccas... uhh, not much happened. I shouted Lawrence and Jeremy to 0.50 cent soft serve cones. And had one myself. We just sat around, listening to music and bumming around. Kai Lun said that if anyone bought him a 2 pounder, he would eat the burger. So Yoshi bought one! It was over $20, and the two pounder had like... 8 patties. There was enough oil in it to I dunno, deep fry all the food in my kitchen. Haha. Apparently one double quarter pounder (aka half pounder) has like already 115% of sodium for the day, and over 100% of saturated fat. So he ate like... enough saturated fat for the next 4 days in that one go. Goodness me.

I hobbled home by myself. Sam and em' were on the 703 bus when I crossed the road. He SMS-ed me saying I was jay walking. I wasn't. Just that the light near the bus loop like... has the green man yet the traffic light is green also for the bus. No idea why it works like that but it's true. But then he was like... pictures or it didn't happen. Grr. I spent the evening chilling in the kitchen with the housemates. Sha made quiche and Jia Chee cooked Hokkien noodles. It was really good. Really good. Hehe.

The night. I dunno, I guess it didn't... go well. I went back to my room to do work but I didn't do work in the end. I don't wanna fail another unit but it seems to be going that way at this rate. Yeah, so I ended up crying in the night. Then I went to sleep by 11 PM just cause I lost reason to stay awake if I wasn't gonna do work. And sitting in my room on my own hurt too much. Why did I cry? I've no idea. The pent up stress. The pent up feelings of missing someone. Of hating yourself. Of asking yourself... why... the hell is everything like this. Why is it like this? I've no idea. If you want to ask me what was the trigger it was cause my mp3s was on rotation and it fell upon Olivia's "Wish". I love this song a lot but it was also the ringtone I specifically gave to someone months back. I just remembered sitting by my bed every night back in Jan waiting to hear that ringtone. It sounds stupid but it was one of the things I looked forward to during the night. So my heart sort of stops when I hear the opening of it...

"Trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you never knew."