Waking up...

I woke up at around 9 AM. I spent the entire day not doing much. I attempted to do my assignment due on Weds. It isn't coming along very well at all. I dunno, it was all still a bit surreal. Today, that is... lunch I just munched on my sandwich with Jia Chee and Sha. In the evening, I felt a bit odd again. Meh. I guess it's just something that happens every evening. Melancholy. Since most of the day was me, alone, in front of a comp. With something looming over me. I suppose I can't expect to be all happy happy joy joy. I don't really care.

I mean the afternoon I did tell someone, that I am fine. I don't care. Whatever. Right now, I should worry about my friends around me. Whom all have MUCH GREATER problems then me. I need to care for them. Cause what I think is so minor, that I am sad for such minor things it's just my own weakness. But I'm also bad at caring for other people. I never know what to say or what to do. And yesterday was a prime example of this. In the end, I would fall back on Yi Xin. I think that may be my focus. If I can't help other people, I'll at least be there for Yi Xin. While she suffers from helping everyone else.

I was thinking. I think I'll move next year. To somewhere else. I dunno where. I dunno whether Sha / Yi Xin will still be in Aus next year, but I hope we will go somewhere else. This house has too many memories already. I think we need a new start somewhere else. If I'm alone next year I'll have to check out with seeing whether I can get Raine as a housemate or something. Whatever it is, I can't stay at this house anymore. I recall mentioning to someone else this morning also. "The reason I stay in uni so much, and never return home until night. Is cause I just feel something is odd with this house. It isn't just me fearing the memories in my room. It's just everything in general. The atmostphere. Only at uni am I the calmest."