When things continue to go haywire...

And things continue to be weird. Can't be bothered doing my normal blog. Let's see... I am currently trying to get my head around....

1.) Helping two of my friends. I've been put in an odd position - I think I understand how Yi Xin felt now - being the one stuck in between. It confuses me. Greatly. And I do not like it, to watch one or the other... in so much pain. May they always be happy. It's a dumb thing to say but, even if I find it hard to smile, I really want everyone around me too. If my friends can be happy, I'll realise that one day I can too.

2.) I am getting increasingly restless. You will not know how much time I spend in my room, sitting there staring at the wall or ceiling wishing there was something I could do. If I had to be honest, I also really want my box cutter back. But I think if I ask Yi Xin now she won't give it back to me. And I do still have my promise to Leon... dammit Leon >.<>.> Even if it's for my own sake... Sha told me don't go and leave scars on yourself. Speaking of scars ~ the one on my arm I noticed is fading. So I'm pretty happy about that. I dunno whether I mentioned this or not. I had a scar on my arm from December I got from shopping... for a gift for someone. Cause I spent like a week running around looking for something nice, and during my rushing about I accidentally sliced a part of my arm. And the scar never disappeared from that. It really annoyed me because it was a reminder to me of my useless efforts (as I couldn't give it anymore by the time I could physically see that person again), and my useless times of hoping, wishing and looking forward to something. I don't know what these things mean anymore but either case, I'm glad the scar is disappearing.

3.) I feel bad. Yeah, I know people are worried. I'm sorry. Sorry to Xin, Sha, Leon, Sammi, K-man, Tom, James and everyone else... I did try to tell people to just forget about me and let me rot. But I know Xin and Leon at least said they would never give up... >.<;; Not too sure what to do...

I guess I may as well do the daily entries. Uhh.. I woke up at like... 10 AM. After sleeping at 1 last night. I've been sleeping too much these days. But it's a sign for me that something is wrong. Cause I refuse to wake up. I refuse to get out of bed. Because I would rather not have to wake up and face the day as usual anymore. It's why I sleep so much. I hate it of course. Even after getting up, within a half hour I was burying my head under my pillow again. And I think I cried a bit but it was like for only 5 minutes so meh... not really anything. I decided to get up straight after cause I was like "OH FUCK THIS SHIT..." and jumped out of bed to shower then go to uni to get some fish and chips.

So off to uni I went, and bought myself some fish and chips. I normally don't eat at uni due to budget constraints, but I said I would once a week. Saw Hieu and Kevin there. Then off to Airport Lounge. Umm... spent lunch chatting with K-man and Leon (and whoever else came near us once in a while). Mahjong group and gamers was basically there. I noticed that Kimmy, Rachel, Jeremy and others were missing. I found out later that everyone ran off to Knox without me. *sniffles* LOL I must learn to be online more often! But I wasn't online much yesterday anyway (by the time I got home, I spent the time drinking some hot choco then I continued sleeping practically in Xin's room half sobbing a bit and just chatting...).

Then the dantai went off. Our 4th day of continous practice. I should be able to complete the dance now for both Toroden and Princess Bride, just need to make it a bit better now. It seems that Jono has now forced both Damien and Martin to learn Hare Hare Yukai as people seem to be dropping out quite a bit. Funny stuff that happened.... uhh.. Amanda T. came to try on Ranna's schoolgirl uniform! It was SUPER MOE!!! CUTE CUTE CUTE. And wayyy sexy. I wanna be so cute and awesome like her *__* I wish wish wish wish~ Martin tried it on before she came. And he ran around being chased by Jono cause he didn't want his photo taken. BEST PHOTOS EVER. Check out Damien's photo album for the evidence of it all.

Near to 5 PM, I left when everyone else was gone. Went back to airport lounge and just sat talking to K-man, Brad, Lawrence, Will and randoms a bit. Leon, Mel, Linda and em' were like sitting at the stage watching a Jdrama on the couch. LOL. It was rather cute to see the group of them. Law kept shoving up the PLANTS VS ZOMBIES SONG IN MY EAR. THE HORROR. IT BURNS MY EARS!!! I left near to 6 PM and went home. Umm... Jono, Xin, Cas, Ai Fang, Kei Boon and John were in the kitchen. I decided to bake lava cakes which didn't turn out too well. Overcooked, I baked another two cakes that were a bit undercooked but more molten at least. I think it was decent (says Cas). Well, it was eating happiness apparently so I hope that means its good! Dinner was nice, Sha and Xin cooked. Chicken wings and some mushroom + vegetable dishes. Ate with Sha, Xin and Jono! Funny stuff in the kitchen... uhh.. Kei Boon keeps washing dishes and getting in my way. When John came home Sha was like "There is an ugly person outside making funny faces at me." and I tried to deny entry to 'ugly' people but John as usual pushed his way through.

And other random things I can't remember. Anyway, I went back to room at 9 PM, and continued to basically be on MSN for like another 5 hours. Trying my best to help people as I can. I don't think getting involved with things is always a good idea - as I don't wanna cause more problems, or influence anyone. But I hope people always remember that I'm always around to help you out too. So meh, just come and ask me. I dunno, I guess it's my personality - even when I'm crying in my own room, if you let me know that you need help - I'll probably put myself to the back of the line and priortise your welfare. I guess this is one of my stronger points - or maybe another example of my selfishness. Why an example? The notion of... helping others to make yourself feel better. I suspect that I support other people for my own welfare and satisfaction. Thus, it doesn't make me a good person at all. Makes me even worse. A real good person helps because they want to. Not because they do so for their own self satisfaction.

Tomorrow is another day. I am not to sure how much I want it to come. But I hate saying that I don't want tomorrow to come. It is insulting my precious friends to be depressed? So why...? I don't know. Keep in mind that I am merely 'depressed' though, I don't have depression (which is a mental illness). Thus, I am not saying anything anyone should be worried about. I realise now that I have little to worry for, and I can't even do anything crazy cause I a.) am not gonna get myself killed and b.) I won't hurt myself right now at least cause of my promise to Leon since I don't realy want to insult an important friend who is showing concern. And to everyone else too. Xin said so herself - that I should at least think about other people then who is watching over me. I know that. But it makes me hate myself even more.

Gah. Enough for today. Spent too many hours thinking already. Head hurting...

I hate it all.

Will update blog soon. But I can note down a few things right now...

1.) I am falling behind work already. SAME MISTAKE AS SEMESTER 1! Go Celine! Being emotional. Thinking about the wrong things in class. And not listening. For the exact same reasons as semester 1. It seems that 5 FUCKING MONTHS of feeling like I have no more heart left in me hasn't done a thing. I tried my best to be happy! I really tried. I managed to get through exams and barely scrape through my units in semester 1. I owe a large amount of that to Leon, Amanda, Mel, James and em'.

I still haven't gotten anywhere though. GO ME!! I fail so badly. Sure, my little non-existent heart was taken away. I should of gotten it back. I should be okay now. I SHOULD BE OKAY NOW!! WHY AM I NOT???? WHY AM I FUCKING NOT???

2.) You know it's bad when you come home YESTERDAY (like TUESDAY) wondering where the FUCK YOU PUT ALL YOUR BOX CUTTERS IN YOUR ROOM. But don't worry! I can't find it. Amanda has it! No, I won't do anything. I'm not stupid. I made a promise to a friend I won't do anything stupid. So I will not break that promise or I'll insult his wishes. So I won't...

Now what the fuck do I do though? I don't want to FUCKING RISK FAILING THIS SEMESTER AGAIN. I can't concentrate in class. I can't laugh properly. I can't do anything properly. I hate it. I hate myself for being like this. I hate myself for being stupid. I hate myself for screwing up. I hate myself for saying the wrong things. I hate myself for doing this to myself. I hate myself for being a useless piece of trash that you would throw away because I am that useless piece of trash.

I am nothing.

A Day at Kimmy's

Today was basically a day spent at Kimmy's house! I woke up fairly early as I had to get to Clayton by 11 something-ish. This IS late for me cause like... I went to sleep late the night before I think. I metup with Andrew Kim at uni bus loop then we bus-ed over to Clayton to meet up with Leon. We waited for the next bus after that to take us to Springvale South, where Kimmy is. And off we went, we didn't really know where to get off, but luckily Kimmy called. Kimmy, Rachel and Yih were waiting for us at the bus stop. We walked over to the park like a minute away. Munched on snacks, played on some weird thing to climb on and had a good time on the swings. Steve came soon after. It was pretty chilly and my layers of jackets wasn't enough it seems for the wind. Luckily Leon wears like 100000 layers of clothing so I got to borrow his jacket, although from the photos I realise I look like a penguin with 4 layers of clothing on.

After the park, we couldn't find Vu... so we walked over to Kimmy's house. It's pretty big, but I think she lives with a lot of people. First we hung out at Kimmy's room. She has SO many like dolls...and posters ALLLL over her room. I was like... WOAH... so this is what a girl's room is like. I'm so boring and plain. We were on the internets for a bit, then we went to the lounge area for some Singstar. It was Disney songs and Hannah Montana, High School Musical and Camp Rock songs. I sang a bit here and there. Kimmy and Rachel are quite an awesome pair (as Kimmy is high and Rachel is low). Hearing Leon, Steve and Vu sing was funny of course. After we got through Disney, Hannah Montana CD was funny cause we didn't really know the music there. Like vaguely. Like I sang a song I heard only once from High School Musical 2 when I saw that movie on the plane ride back to Brunei last year. Funniest was making the guys sing Jessie McCartney!! LOL.

After this... we decided that we needed lunch. And Yih needed to head back home. So we all spent 20 minutes walking to the nearest Red Rooster. I ate like some $3 snack thing that was good enough for a lunch. After this, we walked back to Kimmy's place again, I left my camera at her house. So the guys had to wait for me too. And we missed the bus that comes every 40 minutes. We all hung in Kimmy's room again for a while on the nets and stuff, then me, Leon and Andrew Kim went to Clayton (everyone else had left by now). Andrew Kim was going to the city for a Poker competition or something, while me and Leon went to uni to see if Jono still needed help with his Pocky structure. James and K-man were there too.

At uni... umm... Xin, her sis and Jono did all the Pocky buliding work. James and K-man just sat around talking to someone else. I didn't do anything either, nor did Leon. We are all very useful, lol. Add another hour to that, I spent most of the time just sitting around blankly, oh yeah Mel was there too but she just kept reading manga. Like continously. Uhh... yeah, I just chatted with James, and K-man and stuffs. We all went to visit Jono's office just to put away the unused Pocky boxes after. Had a little adventure in the Engineering deparment, lol. Then me, Xin and Yi Ting walked home. We had a very basic dinner (forgot what it was) and just spent the time online, packing and going to sleep soon after since we're flying off tomorrow!

Mini-Golf

Yay! Today was mini golf! I woke up... and went to uni to meet up with the bus loop group. They were all sitting around and stuffs. We took the bus, and I found it funny that the guys all intentionally had spaces in between each of them. So antisocial!! Our short walk to the mini golf place had me and Rachel complaining about how slow the guys were. And Jenni walking so fast she was gone before we knew it. At the place, we all met up and got into our group's of 4 for mini golf!! I was with Leon, Sammi and Evan. I generally failed at mini golf~ my first few rounds was Leon saying to me to hit it softly and watch as I smack the ball too hard that it never goes in. I obviously didn't know what softly meant. :D I got better as time went on. Behind us was a group with Yvonne, James, Damien, Vu and co. They made fun of us at times but it was all really funny I guess. Evan is pretty good at mini golf! Leon and Sammi are decent. XD

After our first 18 holes outside, we went to do the ones indoors. Over here, we could see Rachel, Tom, Sam and Steve. The only other group involved Phe, Ash, Ash's sister and Jenni. I did equally as bad indoors as I did outdoors! The courses had a bunch of elevators and other weird things. There was a hole in one hole in which I couldn't get a hole in one. T.T There was only like ONNEEE hole where I did better then the others. And that was only one. XD The last hole got funny points cause you can easily get it one shot but I think it was Steve or Rachel who apparently couldn't, lol.

After mini golf, we went to maccas for lunch! Extremely late lunch. XD It was funny cause like, we all tumbled into Steve and Sammi's car, when Ash and Damien's car still had seats open and they are the ones who are technically allowed to drive more people. Oh wells. Maccas was just random crap. Then we walked home from the Mulgrave maccas. Or I did anyway. Vu wanted to go to MSY but there was too many people there, so he decided to head up to the computer shop up on Normanby road. I couldn't be bothered walking so I just went back home. I know that Tom, Sam and Rachel went home after this too. At home I was just on the net the whole time. Later on in the evening, Leon, Evan and Vu came over! And we spent like an hour with those three guys in my room chatttting about random things. XD I dunno why but it was sort of nice to just talk sometimes. ^^;; Oh, that and it was funny to see Vu playing with my teddy (IT'S CUTE) and Leon flipping and throwing my hamster plushie everywhere. Evan was busy copying my anime collection, lol.

Vu left first. Then Evan and Leon eventually. I went down for dinner but I can't remember what happened there. I think I ate with my new housemates. Oh! Apparently Mei Xian left today @.@ Which I didn't realise. But not even Yi Xin had the chance to say good bye to her. Gah. I recall spending the night on MSN having some interesting convos. LOL.

Ice Age 3

I had a bad morning in terms of dreams. Had a dream of... stuff that I've buried deeeeep in the back of my mind. Sucks for it to haunt me in dreams. I keep it out of my thoughts, why can't it just stay there? Stupid dreams that remind me that I miss things... and I still do even now. Bah. I am glad at least these sort of mornings don't happen often anymore. So, it's all good. I was prepared for it anyway. I can just ignore things forever if I so wanted to. But certain friends of mine did say that well, if things did mean that much to me it might never go away? I am just gonna ignore certain stuff forever from now on. I was just taken aback that my dreams had to remind me.

Morning was just net. I had an early lunch on my own as I was hungry. Brunch as you would call it. I went to uni by 1 PM to join up with the dantai. Practiced with them until 3 PM. Then went to the bus loop to meet up with K-man who returned from Sydney. He was gonna join me as I went around searching for Miffy to buy for Tom for his bday!! We went to Chaddy, and shortly Zac came along too (we were also all gonna watch Ice Age 3). In the end, after checking various shops, a small Miffy was found but it was too expensive for such a small plushie. We went to like Toys R Us and stuffs. I found Miffy in that store with Japanese stuff and goth loli clothes but yeah... tooo much!! XD So yes! Ice Age 3! It was with K-man, James, Yi Xin, Lesley and Zac. The movie itself was amusing - I thought it was funny. I never actually saw the second movie, but I did the first one. I was surprised James came but he did (probably cause of K-man). They both went to watch Bruno after - they tried to convince me to come but I couldn't handle two movies, lol. Plus my wallet would burn.

After Ice Age 3, we ate at the western place right outside the cinema. I just had pasta. Then we went to BORDERS until the guys had to like go... and watch Bruno. BORDERS had this TERRIBLE TERRIBLE song playing - something about "wash your hands with toothpaste!" and stuff like that. In the end the song WAS IN MY HEAD, and I kept saying wash my hands with toothpaste... and that makes no sense. We left when Jimmy and K-man had to go - and Lesley drove me and Xin home for the night.

And then there was two...

Woke up to say bye to Jia Chee. Uhh... I wanted to like everyone eat Tim Tams (which is tradition) and drink tea or hot chocolate at the table but when we tried to do that one of our new housemate's auntie and uncle came to the house and was just talking to us all for ages. So there went that idea. Oh well, lol. We all hugged JC and she left. Was a bit weird. Cause she left. And... it was just the remainder of us left. Where the crap did the time go? It's just weird... Me and Xin went to uni for Dantai practice. I just ate like a sushi roll for lunch, lol.

Not much happened. Stan joined us for practiced. And Emma. And Ash' sister. And Eric (year 10 MHS kid - he introduced himself as 'Leon's friend'). And uhh... *thinks* Oh yeah Martin! That's 4 visitors, lol. The group of us was there until 5 PM. Well, in the end it was me, Xin, Jono and Martin left. I asked Martin to leave at 5 PM also to just leave Xin and Jono alone hahaha, and I like refused to walk home with Xin.

Walk home was a bit lonely and depressing though. Oh well, as normal with me of course! Whatever. Like, seriously. Whatever. Or so I say now. I know it isn't whatever. But you know, I like to pretend I never care about anything. Maybe if I do that enough I really won't care one day. I forgot what me and Xin did for dinner, lol. I think we just ate instant noodles or something. It was just the two of us afterall!

Rachel's House

Today I went to Rachel's house! It was also Jia Chee's final night in Melbourne. As Xin went out with Jono, and Jia Chee was packing + closing bank accounts and stuff. I thought I would go visit Rachel! So I met up with her at Glenny station at uh... 10:30 AM I think it was. I wanted to be the first MCAC affiliated member to visit her place, but Law took that spot (I recall SMS-ing her going STONE HIM when I realised he was taking my spot! But I get the #1 girl spot at least). Yay, it took two buses and a 2 minute walk to get to her place. At her house... well first things first. She has a WAYYYY CUTE house. It looked small from the outside, but then I was surprised at all the extensions on her house, the rooms just kept appearing on the inside!! Her room is so cute, so pink and there are like STUFFED PLUSHIES EVERYWHERE!! Like, on the bed, table, shelf, couch and wherever else. I looked at her manga collection, and then she connected her laptop to her TV screen. With MSN on. Uhh... I first of all attempted to impersonate her by talking to Chris on MSN. But that doesn't work too well cause a.) she doesn't talk to Chris often so it was strange and b.) I made it obvious it was me with the talking style and the way I address Chris myself.

We basically spent the afternoon watching anime! And a bit of gaming. Umm... lunch was lasagna! Which she cooked for me and her brother. Anime... we watched first episode of Umineko no Naku Koro ni (YAY new shows), second episode of Reborn (cause I forced her) and first episode of Minami-ke (as Rachel and her bro forced me too). Rachel had an XBox 360, so her and her bro have been playing FREAKIN TALES OF VESPERIA!!! OMFG I WANT THAT GAME SO BADLY! But I don't have a FREAKIN XBOX 360!! And I know they made a remake for the game but it's on PS3!! I DON'T HAVE A PS3!! GAHHHH. As a console RPG gamer and Tales Of franchise fan, I NEED TO PLAY THAT GAME. Okay, I can't say I am a major Tales Of fan having only playing Tales of the Abyss, Tales of Legendia, Tales of Eternia, Tales of Destiny and a bit of Tales of Phantasia. But you know, I think I'm doing pretty good. Tales of Vesperia was so awesome. OMG, third generation console RPG games. I haven't played anything for ages. So this is what it's like. I wonder what it is like playing an RPG on the PS3. @.@ One day... if I have a job. I shall get a TV and a PS3. LOL. And games. Yes I will...

Rachel did game over though. It's an RPG but like, multiple controllers means that multiple people can play cause like... the battle system of Tale Of games is real time fighting rather then the traditional turned based battle (Final Fantasy style) for instance. I was a bit confused, cause while I have played multiple Tales Of games it does change each game and I couldn't really do much fighting. Button mashing works anyway. Long as you don't die, lol.

We watched Minami-ke after this as the siblings forced me to insisting how great it is. I then went home a bit later, Rachel walked me to my bus! When I got home, Jia Chee was ready to go out soon-ish. I went to Glenny earlier as my 2 hour bus ticket would expire otherwise! So I walked around Woolworths and stuffs to kill time but there wasn't much to do. Then JC and Mei Xian came. Uhh... we were in Glenny to eat dinner together. We waited for Christina! We decided to eat at the Hot Pot House in Glenny. YES! Steam boat!!! It was full of people. We had steam boat buffet where you just ORDER A TON OF FOOD. But the place didn't deliver us all the food they owe us!! Cause they knew we wouldn't eat it. WE JUST ATE A TON OF MEAT. Like a ton of meat. I ate so much it was ridiculous. But it was all you can eat after all. And it was expensive. Like $22 or something, lol.

After that, we went home. I opened the door and there was a SCREEEEAAAM. Yep, new housemate! In Joanne and Mei Xian's room. As she's here for a few more days, they are sharing the room then our new housemate, Ai Fang, keeps the room to herself. Xin told me that she was super funny, and super loud. And I could tell straight off! Hahaha. Apparently the new guys in the house also moved in on this day but I didn't notice em', lol. Xin was home already when we got home. And I can't remember what else we did.

The Proposal

Today turned out to be a rather amusing day actually. Most of it was spent sleeping! I basically slept for ages. I think I was supposed to clean my room today but that didn't happen, lol. I woke up around 10:30 AM-ish, cause Joanne woke me up. She was leaving today! I still had our purikura pictures, she needed to get em' before she left. I woke up and we all hung in her room. Eventually, it was time to say good bye and we all made our farewells at the door! It was sad. @.@

Uhh.. then it was lunch. And I was supposed to clean my room. But I didn't. I was on MSN during the afternoon. I think I was like talking to Leon and James. Jimmy was asking me about watching a movie, so I was like ICE AGE 3. Then Jimmy went silent, then Leon tells me in another con that Ice Age 3 is like a crappy indie movie. Obviously they were discussing in another convo without me about how crappy Ice Age 3 was! I guess it's a girl / children's thing to want to watch Ice Age? I think they wanted to see uh... was it Land of the Lost? I wasn't that interested though. In the end, it was like... they would watch a chick flick like The Proposal if a girl went with them. Otherwise it would be too gay for two guys to watch a chick flick. So it was decided! I thought I would eat dinner at maccas with Jimmy and Leon, and we would watch The Proposal! Haha. Near to 4:30 PM, I popped over to Clayton (with Xin's metcard) to buy cheaper movie tickets, and came home. A few hours later Jimmy picked me up to Chaddy maccas.

When we got there we saw Leon stoning out in maccas alone and Jimmy whispers to ignore him. I tried to but he was clearly staring at us. And Jimmy continued to ignore him. And then waved. I think Leon mentioned that a woman was looking at one man waving at another while meeting up. Heh. Eating in maccas with Jimmy and Leon is like watching the two most gayest men sit around feeling each other up. LOL. I recall lots of bad words being thrown around, and me having to look up what 'bukkake' means on wiki~ XD There was another word but I couldn't remember what, and Leon banned me from looking it up on Google! Images. We then went to the cinema. Uhh.. watching a chick flick with these two guys is like LOLs. So like, Leon was in the middle, so I had a wonderful view from my seat next to them as I watch James put his arm around Leon, put his hand on his thigh and crap. I can imagine what people behind us are thinking. LOL. During The Proposal's romantic bits of course!! But yeah, I thought it was a wonderful movie!! I kept going KYAAAA~ and gushing and stuffs! Although I think the guys thought I was totally nuts. But I can't help liking these sort of stories. I was sort of like sinking into my seat half the time and shoving my jacket in front of my face like a little girl.

Don't we all just wish that things would go well as you want it to? We all wish for it. It just doesn't happen. At least not with me anyway. Everyone tells me to just keep on hoping. So fine, I will. I'll hope until my mouth gives its last breath. That my story can end like a fairytale too.

After the movie, I was KYAAA-ing the whole time. And James drove Leon and me home! I know where he lives now!!! LOLOLOL. I think it's supposed to be a secret or something. When I got home, Xin was cooking a bento for Jono for their date tomorrow! It was way cute of her!! SUPER CUTE!! She needed help on muffins. As she burnt her muffins and they raised so much it was a big giant burnt mess. So I got another recipe and tried it out again. And we sat around baking and chatting with Cas. I liked her burnt muffins though. I was still on fangirling and KYAAA-ing in the kitchen though! The bento was really nice looking, with cute cute cute onigiri! I commented saying that I wish I could bake and cook something for someone special. I wanna make a bento for someone I love one day.

I hope I live to see that day. Truly.

Laserwars and farewell celebration...

YAY! Laserwars again. This time with other people and Jono and friends. Uhh... so what happened. We got there, and stood around. And did not do very much, lol. I generally stayed with the MCAC people. Apparently Jono had like excess of $100 in payments so he gave people cash to buy snacks with it. And then it started. Umm... stuff that happened. Well I played DDR a few times. Kriz and Alex were there, so watching Alex DDR is always awesome cause he's epic. Heh. I only spoke to one of Jono's friends outside MCAC affiliation, one of his church friends, some guy in first year who had military training. He was commenting on how weird he thought Jono and [dantai] friends were cause they were practicing a bit at the back of the area during a laserwars break. A nice person but I did have to mention that I was part of the group of weirdos, lol.

Actual laserwars! We did the standard array of stuff. One difference with MCAC is that tag wasn't taken so well, I guess the guys found it boring. And that the MCAC people who did come to laserwars were like veterans compared to everyone else. I am CRAP but I was like ranking between 4th - 7th every round in a game of 30+ people. One thing that we did do though was what Stan wanted to do during MCAC's laserwars was Space Marines. MCAC didn't do it probably cause capture the flag was confusing already and anything else was too confusing. *shrugs* But we managed to do it here so I don't get it. IT WAS AWESOME! Plain awesome. Difference between Space Marines is that you have 4 roles that everyone takes on. The commando (goes rambo on everyone), Heavy Weapons (the tank), The Scout (has rapid fire but you don't want to use this due to ammo so it's useless), The Ammo person (unlimited ammo - has to give ammo to everyone else) and the Medic (gives life to people). Ammo is probably most useful cause it has unlimited ammo and everyone else needs ammo too. I was a useless scout, and I was in the more MCAC team with more veterans in it. Jono directed everyone to their roles and we kept winning every round. I felt bad for the other group. @.@ My role was to guard the vantage point, one of the towers. I was with Kriz (who was a medic and never played a game before until this one - she was photographing for the majority of laserwars) and umm... another guy I don't know and I forgot his name. All I remember was that round one, they stormed the tower right at the start so I was yelling for reinforcements so we took it back. Then the rest of the round was really quiet and peaceful. Since we were just camping.

Round 2 was pretty much the same for me. At the end of this round the green team (we were red team) were angry at us taking the towers so they stormed us but it was end game. Round 3 the guy let green team go inside the arena first so they took over the entire area. Red team had no base left so we were like... LOLOLOL *storms into green base first since there are only a few guards*. We got that but didn't bother protecting it cause we didn't care. Then we throughout the arena in like um... a formation where ammo / medic was in the middle, and the rest of us was around them to move in a clump like that. I was the rear guard, lol. We basically took back both towers but rambo-ing everyone. That was a lot of fun!!

Round 3 I pretty much run around joining the team of people who's job was to rambo into bases. The game was like capture the flag too, so yeah... we needed to storm into green team's base at times. There was one time where I managed to like take people out by myself cause I couldn't find the rest of my team. It was wayyyy fun. Besides that, I ate lots of food (I discovered that rice cakes are AWESOME!!!) and not much else. Some guy gave me 74 tickets from those arcade ticket games, so I exchanged it for a little notebook keyring thing. Hehe. Anyway, we left by 6 AM to catch a 6:10 AM bus that we missed unfortunately. Not saying bye to anyone. @.@

When I got home, I slept until 11 or 12 PM. Got up to eat lunch and cooked food for tonight for the remainder of the afternoon. I was supposed to like go to the bus loop by 5 or something to meet up with the bus people, but Phe was in too much pain from laserwars so he dropped out. Tsan was too busy to come. So it was just Alex and Stan left. James MSN-ed me asking if I wanted a lift, I would take his offer but Jia Chee didn't know about other people being at this event yet! But I took it anyway, then I gave up hiding it from Jia Chee when Alex came over too early and I couldn't hide him outside in the cold. Plus, James was around 10 minutes late so yeah I just told her everything in the end. Jimmy drove the three of us to Bernie's house first, then went to pick up JC + Xin an hour later.

At Bernie's house, umm... I baked cinnamon rolls! Drue thought they looked gross. He was there for only a moment since he had something else on. I also made quiche tarts in the afternoon! Jimmy made chocolate pie. Bernie made Shepherd's pie. Chris brought a carrot and celery sticks platter. Lesley made her giant cookies. Xin and Jia Chee came with like chicken and pasta bake. Jono brought veggies. Stanny made curry fish head! I forgot what else was there. Bernie-kun, Ally... uhh... yeah and I forgot what Alex did. Anyway, the night was a quiet night of food, video games and YouTube videos. For games, first it was Guitar Hero!! I got to play the drums!! It was pretty cool. I thought I picked it up pretty quick. My guitar hero skills are mediocre but I can sort of keep up with Chris + James (not Bernie though who is like hax~). Drums was fun but hard. And Raving Rabits or whatever with those insane rabbits cause I know Jia Chee liked that game although it makes people like James go OMFGWTF!!! It was funny anyway cause I pwned James in it basically :D :D LOLOLOLOL.

YouTube videos... Stanny and Chris were showing us stuff. Of all the Asian YouTube bloggers. Like some Chonny guy or whatever who was like... singing Captain Planet in this most ridiculous way. I thought they were pretty funny!! Some insane videos, lol. I should look at YouTube stuff more often (but it is banned at my house, meh). Night ended in me falling asleep and everyone playing Guitar Hero until people got tired (after we got through the rabbits thing). I think I left at 1 AM (we were the last few people to leave) as umm... Jimmy drove us home I think. Thanks Bernie for letting us use her house for the party!!

OP Shopping

ZOMG... writing entry.. 2 weeks later. Can't... remember. Haha. Oh right! Now I remember. I was supposed to go to the city with Jia Chee and Amanda today. But the night before Jia Chee told me that was cancelled. Apparently they were gonna go to Chaddy for Koko Black or something. And I wasn't invited. Oh more like, she said I could come but she was reluctant to even notify me fearing that I would get upset to know who they were going out with. But couldn't really keep it from me considering we were supposed to head to the city. So I like... meh, okay plans cancelled there. I picked up my phone sent two text messages and yeah, my day was to go OP Shopping with Phe and Ashleigh! Ash invited me weeks ago but yeah, I wasn't gonna go at first. Gomen, Phe-chan ~ if you read this but you know - thanks for keeping me company on this day. Even if I came on purpose cause I knew if I stayed at home to rest I would have like a panic attack in my home while everyone else was out. I like to avoid panic attacks and stuffs cause I'm sort of tired of it all already and I dunno how much more I can take. Meh. Being indifferent is so much easier I think...

So yes! OP Shopping. Uhh... I slept quite a bit and at 1 PM went to bus loop where Ash picked me up. And Phe-chan. We went to Cheltenham basically and met up with Emma at the station there. We just went to a bunch of OP shops and found nothing. And lunch was ice cream at Dairy Bell! It was awesome. I had chocolate of course~ that was chocolate dipped with a wafer cone. It was way good. We hopped over to Southland after that. I felt a bit odd there to be honest cause I haven't been there since last year when I went with umm... Jia Chee, Les and... yeah... oh well. Need to get over these things. I know. It was fail on my part anyway. Phe was so tired that umm... we decided to go home by like 3 PM, lol.

Uhh... Emma and Ash hung around for a bit drinking hot choco and waiting for Jia Chee to return from Chaddy to say bye to her. After that, me and Phe blacked out. Haha. Phe stayed to sleep on my couch! And he stayed for dinner too, which I thought was rather odd since it's a very... unusual guest I would say. We both woke up to Jia Chee's porridge dinner which was nice. Then our house (me, Phe, Amanda, Jia Chee, Cas and Thomas) walked over to Stanny's house. It was laserwars tonight, meet up point with Jono was at Stan/Alex's place. The guys were playing LOTR Risk. Haven't seen Kriz in a while ~ she was watching stuff with Phe. Cas and em' played cards on the floor. I played a game of cards then went to nap in Stanny's room for more energy. Anyway, past 11 PM we got up and ran for the bus. Jia Chee ran home since like... she wasn't going to laserwars. She took the bus to avoid walking home far though. Anyway, we got to Sidetracked nicely on time. And laserwars entry is for the next day.

Cook-a-thon

Okay, the cook-a-thon refers to a pot luck we had tonight that Jia Chee dubbed a cook-a-thon but it was just a normal dinner really, lol. I think she just wanted it sound cooler. We watched movies until around 5 AM, and I didn't sleep until 7 AM I think. But yes, the movies. Forrest Gump was interesting. I liked it. I slept through Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy or whatever unfortunately. I watched Lord of the Flies. Very interesting. Don't really like seeing little boys hurt each other. But I thought it would be more bloody, it wasn't. It was interesting in that it showed as the boys degenerated more and more to their primal instincts, but in the end it wasn't very much. I mean like a movie critic quoted, kids on the street do much more nasty things to each other then what is seen in that movie. Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down. OMFG WHY THE HELL DID WE WATCH THIS? It was.... the most ridiculous movie ever. The sex scene was like nearing porn and we were like "OMFG WHY ARE WE WATCHING PORN TOGETHER????" The main characters are messed up. They FELL IN LOVE THROUGH... the most violent relationship EVER?? WTFFFF!!!

Went to sleep at 7AM! Movies finished at 5 AM but I stuck around online a bit longer. Woke up around 1 AM. Woke up in time for lunch. Can't remember what I ate though. Then I went to Clayton by myself again! I had to cook food for the cook-a-thon! Clayton was fairly fast though as I tried to move quick. I was gonna go with Xin but she like left early and left Clayton before I got there. @.@ So I shopped around until Stan came! We went to the fish market and stuffs. That night, V, Tsan and Eric (Jia Chee's friend) didn't come. So it was just Alex L. and Stanny that came over! Cas and Thomas was eating with us too so I made sure to make vegan food! Dessert we had churros but I made vegan brownies for Thomas. And uhh... I fried vegan noodles. Made it with like fake mince and fake meat loaf, and some vegetables. Jia Chee cooked her lo ba ko!! SO GOOOD! Xin did roast vegetables ~ Stan did kai lan ~ umm... Alex brought corn. Except for Jia Chee, everyone did veggie related dishes! LOL. Ah well. It was good.

We didn't eat the churros in the end, but yeah.... vegan brownies turned out good surprisingly. Even without milk or eggs! Noodles was okay. It was a pleasant dinner. Forgot what I did at night, ehehehe.

The Zoo Trip

The awaited Zoo Trip! Hehe. I got up around 8 AM and did the usual. I heated up the noodles in the morning to let them cool before taking a shower. Then me and Xin went off with all the food + two cakes. The noodles was rather heavy, thank goodness for Yi Xin. But she took it all on herself and carried everything when it was hurting her shoulder... she's like the perfect guy, seriously. Except that she isn't a guy. Meh, people need to carry things for her more often. T.T

Umm... yeah, we basically just bus-ed over and trained over while chatting about stuff. Xin looked really tired... I must take care of her better! She forgot her wallet at home, more like she couldn't find it (found it when we got home at night though). So I just leant her monies for the day. When we got to Flinders, everyone was there already. What happened there... uhh... we met the mystery friend of Leon. Heh, Josh is a friendly guy. I think Leon said earlier he was a shy guy but I don't see him being shy considering he was actively talking to all of us. LOL, the shy label comes with a lot of presumptions and it just reminded me that a person should never apply labels or presumptions on someone they have never met. It reminds me of my education classes where my tutors tells us that a big problem in schools is when you enter a new school, your fellow colleague can be like "Oh! You have THAT class. Ohohoho~ you're gonna have trouble now. Or that you have THAT BOY in your class, he's impossible to deal with" and stuff. These things are labels and they are a problem just cause a person will make up assumptions before meeting the class or person, and from the very beginning part of your judgement has already been formed. It can be undone but... a bit harder I suppose?

We just stood around. I was cold so Sammi + Linda and Kimmy were cuddling up and group hugging for warmth. Then we started jumping. And spinning. Yeah, we are totally sane. Like totally. We were waiting for neko-manda (Amanda T.) as she was running late. Me and Mel went to look for a fricken' Westpac ATM cause I needed more cash. We went around a WHOOLLLEE block cause we couldn't find one in Flinders. LOL WTF there was like ANZ AND COMMONWEALTH EVERYWHERE! I got the fail bank when I came here, didn't I? We finally found one and got back to Flinders to find out that Sam went to Minotaur but jay-walked and got booked (aka, caught and fined)! LOL, me and Mel were doing the same thing. Lucky we didn't get caught. Me and Xin went to buy a bit of brekky at Tower Sushi. Then neko-manda came so off we went onto another train to Royal Park station (next to the Zoo!).

Tickets were $18 for concession pretty much. Xin had no student card so boo... it had to be $24. I won't list out all the animals we saw cause there were too many. Just the funny stuff I can remember. Went in Loons wanted to see the water recycling plant. Yeah, I totally came to toe Zoo for that! We decided to walk in a group, although we had faster walkers and slower walkers (in the end we waited for each other though). Everyone snapped lots of photos. So many animals! I know Mel wanted to see monkeys, Leon wanted to see elephants and meerkats and uhh... who else. I am not sure. Haha.

Lunch was near to 1 PM. Everyone basically brought snacks almsot (cept for Andrew Kim who made some... rice... egg... sweet thingy and Loons brought... eggs. LOL) Sam brought cookies in his jar. That was cute. I dunno who brought what else. My noodles were a success. Okay, with the combination of everyone's efforts. Not my noodles. Considering how I like BAILED. But yeah, food was good. The cake efforts were hilarious. So, me, Mel and Xin attempt to like light up the cakes on the other side of the area we were eating at. But that side had the wind BLOWING RIGHT ONTO US. It was impossible basically. And my bag carrying like ruined the 100's and 1000's decorations I threw onto the cake. Tried to fix that up. In the end we were like FUCK THIS and attempted to light the cakes in front of the people involved. TOTALLY SUBTLE, weren't we? It was near impossible too, people had to get it lighted then blow it out straight away or it wasn't gonna work! The two cakes I made were eaten (HUGE SLICES) and no one wanted the store bought mudcake. The bdays was for Yih, James L. and Will! So three cakes. Ah well, it was all still good. Food was good, haha. We decided to pack up and leave as we didn't have that much time left to cover the rest of the zoo.

What else. The jacket thing! I wasn't cold for some reason at the zoo. Temp wise it wasn't THAT bad. It didn't rain too much at least (while we were eating only). So yeah, I was fine walking around in my red dress thing and a long sleeve jumper on the inside. I had like an extra jumper plus my monkey hoodie though. So the funny thing is that Leon wears a lot of layers but gives his jackets to other people. As Josh and neko-manda was like wearing his jackets he was actually cold so I gave him my hoodie. I just find it funny that you have all these coats and you end up wearing someone else's cause you gave em' away. Haha. Would be funny if I like took someone else's jumper but I wasn't cold luckily. :3 :3

So off we went after lunch. Random things I remember. Umm... two baby orangutans reminded me of Kimmy and Alan. Way cute. I was dying in the butterfly house because it was too hot in there. So I had to run for it. Elephants are cool. I am sad there were no sloths at the zoo? Leon said he would point them out to me once cause I didn't know what a sloth was. BOO. We stopped momentarily at this... japanese garden or something. LOL. Our group split ways momomentarily when some of us went to look at meerkats + found a wishing well. I threw in two coins and made two wishes. May they come true! One of them did but the other one probably never will. A girl can wish, right? Long as I don't hang onto dreams and the impossible I'll be fine...

After this, we sat around in a cafe place. I took a group photo! And I had to go back for dinner as Cas and Jia Chee were cooking tonight! Home made wanton!! So me, Xin and Yih left but uhh... got called back cause I left my hoodie with Leon and forgot all about it, lol. We didn't get too far and everyone joined to leave with us. We went to the animal shop momentarily to play with the dolls. The plush toys were cute but... expensive. @.@ Anyway, I bought churros to bring home at Flinders Street station. I think I said BYEEE to the group like... several times before I actually left! I missed the train, lol. Couldn't help it!!!

Dinnner was good. We were gonna have movie night tongiht! Cas and Mas went to look for the cable to connect a laptop to a TV but couldn't find one. I should of did it but I failed. Due to my busyness and laziness. Cas and Jia Chee made wonton noodle soup which was really good. Home made wontons that they spent all afternoon doing!! It was mushroom and spinach, so Thomas could eat it (as Cas is vegetarian and Thomas is vegan). Thomas made um... cranberry crumble for dessert! It was way good. We ate it with soymilk ice cream. Which was really good too (for ice cream without dairy). And then off to movie night! We had to watch off a laptop unfortunately. Cas sweeped and cleaned up the floor upstairs so I brought my matress out and shoved it onto the floor. So three of us sat on my matress while Xin and JC sat on the couch. I was cold so I had like a pillow and my blanket around me during the duration of movie watching. We had a bunch of snacks and stuff and coke!! Haha, a load of fun. Sea weed snack is <3.

Movies we watched was Forrest Gump, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (I slept through this movie), Lord of the Flies, Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down (SHOOOT US FOR WATCHING THIS CRAP). Commentary on the movies is tomorrow's entry I think, haha.